My Gods. This. So very much this. How. Perfect. I wish you the best in your decision, Sister!
“Apollo is the blackest darkness and the most glaring light in one entity. He is death and destruction and healing and enlightenment. He is madness and perfection. He is order, law, repeal of the contradictions, He is harmony. He is the point in between … the borderline between all opposites. He is the most perfect paradox in my entire existence and I adore Him more than anything else.
He is art, sound, inspiration, character, image, metaphor. His imperfection makes Him perfect. He suffers, He loves, He is obsessive, He is impulsive, He is jealous and engrossing, He is hot-tempered. He is wise and childish and charming and funny. He is calculated and He plays poker very high. He is arrogant and condescending and overestimates himself sometimes. He is very dominant.
But if He loves, He can submit to your feet and gives you EVERYTHING. Love is His greatest weakness and strength in one. He is a protector and avenger. When it comes to people who are important to Him, He messes with the highest powers and risks honor and status, only out of love. He knows what it means to lose and to suffer. He knows great pain and this makes Him dangerous and strong, because He knows exactly WHERE it really hurts. He felt this pain before. You can be sure that His arrow hits you at exactly this point. I will never sugarcoat His dark sides. Never. They are the reason why I love Him.”